Weight Loss Journey

My Weight Loss Journey Questions

3 December 2014

After decades of battling my weight, I have come up with questions (in no particular order)…

Why am I consumed with thoughts of food?

Why am I always thinking about the next time I get to eat?

Why can I not just push food away when I am no longer hungry?

Why do I not ever feel full? Or do I just not recognize the feeling?

Why when I taste something good do I then become obsessed with eating as much of it as I can?

Why can I gain so much weight in just a few days of eating bad, and it takes weeks of eating good to lose it?

Why do I always seem to be hungry or ready to eat?

Why does it have to be so much harder to lose weight the older I get?

Why can I not convince myself that thin feels better than any food tastes?

How do I keep finding the strength for this battle?

Home Stretch

1 May 2014

home-stretchWe are coming down to it. The final month of my 5 month commitment to lose 20 pounds by June 1st.

That means I would have to average 4 pounds a month. Well, so far that has not happened. The first two months were right on schedule. The last two have been an absolute grind with very slow weight loss.

As of today, I am down to 213. That means I need to lose 8 pounds in one month to reach my commitment. I can tell you right now, that is impossible for me alone.

Sure, I could probably do something radical like stop eating or some liquid diet. But that is not going to happen. I will continue to do what I know is right in the quantity of food I eat. I will continue striving to control what I eat rather than letting the food control me.

My hope and prayer is that it will happen. However, if it does, it will be all God. I will do my part, but, I have been doing it for the past two months with not much loss. So if 8 pounds come off in this one month, it will be ALL God’s glory, not mine.

Stay tuned.

Still Working Hard

4 April 2014

4185389_1373369880I have now completed three months of my 5 month commitment to lose 20 pounds. This morning I was down to 214.5. Technically, that is behind schedule as I need to average 4 pounds a month. However, I know that God can still make it happen. Just have to keep doing my part.

As long as I have been on my weight loss journey, you would think I would have learned everything I needed to learn about how it works. But, no, God still keeps teaching me things. Some things over and over.

I had been stuck on 216 for a long time. Finally, two days ago I was down to 215.5. Then, inexplicably, yesterday I was UP to 217. This is usually enough to make me angry. Even though I told myself it was just a fluke and it would be okay, I still was not happy about it. These kind of things can really ruin my day

Sure enough, this morning I was surprised to see the scale sitting at 214.5.

So God is continuing to teach me to be patient and trust in His time. I am really afraid He will have to keep teaching me this, but I think I am getting better at it.

Two Month Update

27 February 2014

patienceThis month has been successful AND frustrating.

I made a commitment to lose 20 pounds by June 1. That means an average loss of 4 pounds per month. January, I was ahead of schedule. I lost 6 pounds. February, another story. I only lost 2 pounds.

The good news is, I am right on schedule. 8 pounds in two months. The bad news is those last two pounds were very hard. I was eating so well all month, I found it disappointing to only lose 2 pounds. And it makes the next 4 seem like it will be impossible.

I know, I know. I should be rejoicing in the victory God has given me and not worrying about the future. Like I have always said, all I can do is my part. AND, the fact is, I am right on schedule!

So praise God for the loss he has given me. I will do my best to be patient for the rest.

Quick Update After One Month

30 January 2014

check-mark-hiSeveral weeks ago, I announced my latest weight loss commitment. Lose 20 pounds before June 1st.

Well, it certainly is not going with the speed it once did, but it is going. After almost one month, I am down 6 pounds to 219. I need to average four pounds a month to fulfill this commitment, so I am a little ahead.

So far, God has blessed me with a lot of self control. A few times I have wanted to slip up and lose control, but God helped me with victories. I have been doing my part and of course, God it faithful with His.

Still a long way to go, but it feels great to be losing weight!

It’s A Brand New Day

2 January 2014

sunriseThe holidays are now over. It is time to get back to work on losing weight.

The past few years have not been good for my weight. Pounds have crept back on. My lowest weight way back was 192. I was not there for long, but that is what is was. My current weight? Well, I am embarrassed to say it is up to 225 this morning.

HOWEVER, I am not getting down about where I am at. I am excited for where I am going, and that is down! Today starts my newest commitment to losing weight. I want to lose at least 20 pounds. Preferably in three or four months, but more realistically before summer.

My weight does not come off easy anymore. Every pound is a battle. I have made new commitments several times over the past couple of years and I have failed. This time, failure is not an option. Why?

I am going to do something that I have not done in a long time. I have committed to God to do this. As He said, it is better to not make a promise than to make a promise and break it. I will not break this promise. Admittedly, I am scared to make this promise because I have failed so many times. However, I have prayed about it and feel it is what I am suppose to do.

So, plan to see less and less of me over the next few months because there will be less of me. Smile

It’s a brand new day and I am excited about it!

The Most Wonderful Time of The Year (To Gain Weight)

12 December 2013

overeatFrom Thanksgiving through New Years is the toughest time for me to lose weight. It is hard enough the rest of the year, but this time frame is close to impossible. So what to do?

My goal during this time is to stay in control. Many times, I decide to let food control me.

There are going to be days during this time when I will eat much higher calorie foods than I normally do. Instead of torturing myself and denying it all, I just need to stay in control and not overeat. Of course, that is much easier said than done. But I know, with God’s help, I can do it.

That is not to say I will be perfect, In fact, I have already had a couple of times this season I gave up the control. It made me feel horrible (physically and emotionally), yet I still do it.

So, if I can just maintain my weight through this time period, then I call it a success. The weight loss can begin again with the new year.

Time To Roll… Again

16 July 2013

Start Over Renewal Restart Round Red ButtonOne good thing about a weight loss journey, you can always start over. Even when you have failed miserably, you can begin again. Even when you have started over 100 times, there is no problem with starting over the 101st time. In fact, every day is a day to start over.

My last “start over” was January of this year. I had a good run losing 8 pounds. However, I was never able to push past that amount. I got lazy. I got less disciplined. I maintained, but I did not lose. Then, of course, vacation came.

Vacation is when I turn off the switch. My yearly free-for-all. Believe it or not, I think I did better this year than any other. While my meals were not anywhere near calorie controlled, I decided I would not eat between meals. That went pretty well, a few exceptions (think “Vanilla filled churro”), but for the most part, I did okay.

However, I was still up 8 pounds. One week, 8 pounds. Amazing the damage you can do in such a short time. Took me two months to lose it. One week to gain it back.

So, it is time to start over. Start over with my disciplined eating and start over with my running.

As far as running goes, it has been a long time since I ran 5k. I am ready to get that built back up. I am going to roll back my Couch25k app back to week 4 (there are 8) and start from there building back up. I am ready again to be disciplined in my running.

A far as eating, I know how to do it. I know what I can and cannot eat. I know how much I can and cannot eat. I am ready to be disciplined in my eating again.

Time to roll.

Some Success And Some No So Much

28 February 2013

Last week I weighed in and was down 8 pounds since January 1st. That felt great! I had forgotten how good it feels to be in weight loss mode and actually losing weight.

THEN, the the snow came. We were basically in the house for two straight days. This is very much not conducive to eating well. So for two days, I made some poor choices. I failed on having discipline in what I ate. I had all the good choices available to me, I just chose to not eat them.

Needless to say, I was up a couple of pounds this morning. My discipline is kicking back in now and I hope to be back down with even more weight loss very soon.

Discipline Update

14 February 2013

If you read my last post, you know I was attempting to focus less on losing weight and more on being disciplined in what I eat.

So far, I have been blessed in this attempt and have been doing very well. Since the new year, I have lost 7 pounds. Many, many of those days were difficult. Many times I stood in front of a mirror giving myself a drill sergeant speech on how I was not going eat. Kinda silly sounding, but it helped!

It feels so good to be in weight loss mode again. Seems like it has been a long time since I have lost weight. It is good to know I can still do it!

As far as running, it too has gone well. Through the winter, I am not attempting to build up my running,  but simply to maintain a certain level. My runs consist of running 20 minutes, walking three minutes, then running another 5 minutes. It equals to somewhere around 2.5 miles of running. Once the weather stabilizes, I will start pushing again to get back up to 5k.

God is so good!

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