In my previous post, I stated how well things were going and that I was down to 208 pounds. Not two days after that, my patience was tested.
For some reason, I went up two pounds to 210 in one day. I track all my eating and looking back on that day, I had eaten well. Nothing out of the ordinary. I was on my plan. But for some reason, I went up two pounds.
I was okay, I figured it was just an anomaly and it would quickly fix itself as long as I stayed on track. I was wrong. I went even higher up to 212 the net couple of days.
Are you kidding me? I am doing everything right and my weight is increasing. This was testing me. Am I gonna freak out, get angry and give up? Or am I going to keep going on and trust that it will work out. Honestly, my thoughts went back and forth between those two things. But in the end, I stayed calm and patient.
As of today, I am back to 209. Still needing lots of patience since I am not even back to where I was two weeks ago. But I am good.
So my question is, was God behind this testing or was it just something that happened? I guess I do not really know the answer to that, but I do know this… God is using this time to help me grow (I mean spiritually, not physically).
My prayer for a long time has been to take my desire to eat away. I would much rather be in a place where I had to eat rather that constantly wanting to eat. I fear, though, that this is my “Thorn in the flesh” that I will have to deal with the rest of my life. Right now, I am at peace with that and this recent testing helped a lot.
I have the rest of my life to lose the weight. My battle is not the weight, but the control food has over me. Only God should have that kind of control. The weight loss is simply a side effect.